Never Forsaken

God, You and You alone have never left me nor forsaken me. It is no wonder then, that my heart is always drawn towards you. I can't thank you enough for Your love... and the way you teach me and change me... You never give up on me. You never ever stop refining me.

Thank you for giving me another chance to draw closer to you. Thank you that I'm not bound by yesterday. I'm not bound by heartbreak, by mistakes, by failures or by anything. No weapon formed against me shall prosper. And even when I feel like crumbling and hiding, I will lift my hands and praise You. For You oh God are the maker of heaven and earth, yet, you have not forgotten me.

I have lived my life, and I've definitely made mistakes, but I will keep on living and will proclaim your praise, for you have made all things New. You have cast my sins as far as the east is from the west. You have taken my shame. You have crowned me with your annointing and have kept my feet from straying too far. My cup overflows.

When I feel empty and dry, I will praise you, for you Oh God have rescued me from the pit of despair. You will turn my mourning into dancing and my sadness into laughter.

Hey. I don't know what the future holds and that is freaky, but the new Sarah. She's gonna do her best to sit back and enjoy the ride. She doesn't have to be in control. She doesn't have to know tomorrow. All she has to do is die. Everyday, let her old self go and remember. She is- I am new.

What does this mean? Well. I guess I'll find out. All I know is that my God is good. And if I have to keep saying it and saying it and saying... I will. Until I believe it with EVERYTHING in me. And if I have to keep losing, and losing and losing, until it is God first, second third fourth... Then God help me. I will.

Of course, when I'm in the process of losing something, I fight. I hang on. I tighten my grib because I don't want God to take what I believe he has given me. But what is trust anyway? My heart's cry is to trust in my God. I want to be someone who people see and KNOW. There's something different.

I can't go back and change past mistakes. I can't even look back and hang onto that shame and guilt. No. I must press on and forget the past and look forward towards what my Father has for me. I am not my own. And the sooner I learn that, the happier I will be.

Lord, You see. You know. I know I didn't need to write this here for You to hear it. I wrote it here as a proclamation. My life is a testimony of your grace. And may your grace be known and Your name glorified.

May I decrease and you increase. If I must lose the "self" I knew in order to draw closer to you, then so be it.

And when I get down... I'm gonna get up again. I'm gonna stand. Not because of my own strength. If I had to rely on that, I surely would not make it, but Your strength is made perfect in my weakness. So, now, I am stronger than before, for I am weak.

God, Teach me what it means to be the new creation that you have designed me to be...
Amen, amen and amen! God be with me, and God be with you...