The Long Wait
I planned. I prepared. I knew exactly what the agenda was, and now here I am waiting. Ok, maybe I was a little bit of an overachiever. Maybe I was a little bit too prepared for anything to happen... But either way, I am here in Kansas City with about two hours to twiddle my thumbs before my plane takes off...
I've planned and prepared for a great many things in life... I had my image of how I thought my life would play out, and at 18, I had a real "clear" picture of how I knew my life would go. When I turned 18, I knew it was only a matter of time until I met my destiny. My MRS Degree was just around the corner. Yes, if you've read my blog, you probably already know about this, but I was certain that I would fulfill my lifelong calling to be a wife just as soon as I turned 18. And quickly after fulfill my other calling to motherhood. I'd have 4 kids before 30 and then just spend the rest of my life doing.... Ok. Really, I hadn't thought that far :).
At about 21 I realized that wasn't God's plan, but I felt certain that by 23 God would fulfill his plans for me, and at 23... you guessed it. No, I wasn't discouraged. I just pushed my plans back a couple years and made a few adjustments, but at 25, my grand plans were shot and I realized my plans were not working for me.
What could God's purpose be in causing me to wait?
The longer I wait, the more clearly I begin to see --My life is not all about getting married and having children. That is not my ultimate destiny. As I wait, God prepares me to become a bride. Perhaps a bride for someone here on earth, but more importantly, His Bride. THAT is my ultimate destiny. While I am longing and waiting for a family of my own, God is longing and aching for me.
My eyes are still adjusting to this new vision. The focus is not an earthly destination - but a heavenly one. Yes. God is what matters more than anything. God's will. His plans. His story. So I will wait. I will wait in anticipation of the day I get to meet HIM, My SAVIOR!
Speaking of Saviors... Have you thought about salvation much and what it really means? There's a story about this a man named Jesus.....
(Ps. My flight just got delayed! Yes! I am absolutely full of Joy because God is right here with me the entirety of my wait... whatever the wait is!)
I've planned and prepared for a great many things in life... I had my image of how I thought my life would play out, and at 18, I had a real "clear" picture of how I knew my life would go. When I turned 18, I knew it was only a matter of time until I met my destiny. My MRS Degree was just around the corner. Yes, if you've read my blog, you probably already know about this, but I was certain that I would fulfill my lifelong calling to be a wife just as soon as I turned 18. And quickly after fulfill my other calling to motherhood. I'd have 4 kids before 30 and then just spend the rest of my life doing.... Ok. Really, I hadn't thought that far :).
At about 21 I realized that wasn't God's plan, but I felt certain that by 23 God would fulfill his plans for me, and at 23... you guessed it. No, I wasn't discouraged. I just pushed my plans back a couple years and made a few adjustments, but at 25, my grand plans were shot and I realized my plans were not working for me.
What could God's purpose be in causing me to wait?
The longer I wait, the more clearly I begin to see --My life is not all about getting married and having children. That is not my ultimate destiny. As I wait, God prepares me to become a bride. Perhaps a bride for someone here on earth, but more importantly, His Bride. THAT is my ultimate destiny. While I am longing and waiting for a family of my own, God is longing and aching for me.
My eyes are still adjusting to this new vision. The focus is not an earthly destination - but a heavenly one. Yes. God is what matters more than anything. God's will. His plans. His story. So I will wait. I will wait in anticipation of the day I get to meet HIM, My SAVIOR!
Speaking of Saviors... Have you thought about salvation much and what it really means? There's a story about this a man named Jesus.....
(Ps. My flight just got delayed! Yes! I am absolutely full of Joy because God is right here with me the entirety of my wait... whatever the wait is!)
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